by Matthew Christopher, for Match.com’s Happen magazine
Faux pas: Schlumping in public
The day you dash to the corner store for a quart of milk with hat-head and fuzzy teeth is the day you’ll find yourself next to Adonis himself in the checkout line. But hey, it happens to the best of us sometimes — caught with our pants down on laundry day, sans milk. What to do? Drop the dairy and run for the hills? Wait, not so fast.
Fix: Activate your inner artiste
Dash out of line, and grab up a bottle of wine and a chunk of cheese. Now, with that sensible milk under one arm and flash Beaujolais under the other, you look instantly more sophisticated — smartly bohemian even — like you’ve been up all night working on your masterpiece, and you’re expecting company at cocktail hour. How cool is that?
Faux pas: Being a wallflower
To get his attention you’ve got to make an impression. This is not the time to play the strong, silent type. But how do you make sure he’ll take notice?
Fix: Speak! Say something, anything
In a pinch, even a mention of the weather is better than nothing. Get creative. Ditch the overused “Hot enough for ya?” and try something like, “I swear, this heat makes me feel like a prostrated pansy, wilting away in the garden of good and evil. Say, would you know of any place to get an iced tea?”
Faux pas: Failure to finagle a future run-in
So you had a titillating tete-a-tete in the checkout line, and now he’s about to go. Are you just going to let him walk away into the abyss? You’ll kick yourself later if you don’t act now!
Fix: Concoct a coincidence
Ask him, “Would you happen to know what time the Tea Dances are at Diva’s on Sundays? I was kind of thinking of checking it out this week.” Then, get your petutie to that Tea Dance this Sunday, without fail. Trust me, honey, he’ll show up.
Faux pas: Failure to flatter
If you don’t make him feel like the man, somebody else will. Flattery is an aphrodisiac. Just like Mom said, if you can’t say something nice, maybe you’re in the wrong business — or something like that. But don’t worry, it’s really pretty simple.
Fix: Simple sincerity
Leave him feeling pumped up by telling him how great it was to meet him. Tell him you look forward to crossing paths again soon. Be sincere. If you’re really feeling lucky, give him your email address and ask him if he wouldn’t mind forwarding you that article he mentioned on California vineyards. If you’ve played your cards right, you’ll definitely be hearing from him later.
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